Whitesnake, "Here I Go Again"

Yes, It's That Video With the Girl and the Cars  

THE VIDEO Whitesnake, "Here I Go Again," Whitesnake, 1987, Geffen 

SAMPLE LYRIC "And here I go again on my oh-ow-own / goin' down the only road I've ever kno-own! / like a drifter I was baw-owrn to walk a-loh-oh-one" 

THE VERDICT Thought I was gonna do something all romantic for Valentine's Day, did you? Nah. I'm saving all that stuff for March, when yes, for the second year in a row I am going to be doing a whole month of nothing but power ballads. Given that we have all that syrupy sweet stuff coming down the pike, I didn't feel too compelled to go in that direction this week. 

Besides, haven't you had enough pink and hearts and angels and looove and whatnot crammed down your throat? Whitesnake's "Here I Go Again" video is kind of an antidote for that stuff. I mean yeah, as per always, David Coverdale is full-on open-mouth-kissing Tawny Kitaen all over this video. Seriously, it's like a mama bird feeding a baby bird. Gee-ross. 

But really, "Here I Go Again" isn't a relationship song in that way at all. It's a breakup song, or more specifically, a divorce song. David Coverdale wrote it when he realized his previous marriage had reached the point of no return. Hence, "here I go again on my own." It's a pick yourself up, dust yourself off, and move on song. 

Also though, I had to do it because this is really a classic 80s metal video. Even though Whitesnake aren't, you know, that metal per se, Tawny Kitaen doing a front walkover on those Jaguars is really part of the metal canon. I mean think about it — this video has basically everything people thought was sexy in the 80s:

 

Lots of keyboards: Most Whitesnake songs aren't especially keyboard heavy, but this one's got more memorable keyboard fills than guitar solos. And think about it — the 80s were the decade of the keyboard. Between synthesizers and keytars, it was like every genre of music at least briefly embraced some kind of digital love. 

Okay not thrash metal, but most other stuff. This video really foregrounds the keyboards, too. The whole first verse, until it really starts rocking, we keep seeing Adrian Vandenberg, John Sykes, and dude honestly, I'm not even sure who else (they're backlit and like half a dozen people contributed bass and keyboard work to this album) each with his own giant keyboard. 

Adrian and one other guy are also holding guitars, which amuses me. But yeah, the beginning of this song, and how it's visualized, feels like a sort of weird keyboard church thing. 

Tawny Kitaen: This is the kind of gal America loved in the 80s. Think about it — great smile, tons of hair, long legs, plus it's the pre-implants era. Physically, Tawny's got a lot in common with other paragons of 80s beauty like Christie Brinkley or Tiffani Amber Thiessen Kelly Kapowski. 

She also sports some seriously 80s fashions in this video. The sheer white shirt thing over a thong-leotard is some hardcore 80s weirdness. It's like she's having some kind of "Calgon, take me away" moment there on the Jags. But also the shimmery green dress she wears in the car just screams Dynasty to me — so again, super 80s. 

Also — I don't know why, but I just remembered this, which means probably you'll remember it too — remember how after this, Tawny co-hosted the genuinely awful America's Funniest People? With Dave Coulier, the unfunny Full House uncle and inexplicable inspiration for "You Oughta Know"? You know, it was sort of like America's Funniest Home Videos (which at the time was hosted by Bob Saget, so hey, how come Uncle Jesse never got his own VHS blooper show?), but crossed with Candid Camera?

Apparently some other gal was the original cohost, but I only remember Tawny doing it. Post-Coverdale, it was where she went again on her own. Who knew that the idiocy of the Jackalope was the only road she'd ever known.

 

Expensive cars: The pair of Jaguars that Tawny plays on are really an iconic piece of this video, and of the time. Imagine the whole "yes I'll take one in black, and one in white, and then I'll let my girlfriend cartwheel around on them" transaction — very smooth, very 80s. 

I feel like having some kind of over-the-top car was basically a requirement of 80s movies, particularly teen movies where the car belongs to someone's dad and gets destroyed or at least dinged up. Think the Porsche in Risky Business, the Rolls in Sixteen Candles, the Ferrari in Ferris Bueller's Day Off. Ooh, or sportscars and iconic 80s women! Remember Christie Brinkley and the red Ferrari in National Lampoon's Vacation? 

Miami Vice-style mens' suits: In discussing the wardrobe in this video, let us not forget to mention the incredible Miami Vice-esque unstructured suit that David Coverdale is wearing in the car. His jacket is deep teal! It would totally look good on Tubbs. 

You know a couple of years back a friend of mine unearthed some deadstock jackets just like that that were actually from the Miami Vice collection (apparently they sold branded apparel), but they were a little expensive so I turned them down. Bad decision, I would be totally stoked if I had one of those now. 

Long story short though, this was the look of the 80s, at least for yup-wardly mobile men. Just the other day I read an article where Duran Duran claimed that they started this look and then Miami Vice picked it up, but come on, who are they kidding. In any event, with his turquoise soft blazer and skinny black tie, David Coverdale is totally rocking the soft suit.

Debauchery: I know, I know. This is hardly unique to the 80s. But I put this here for one reason, and one reason alone. Um, in case you hadn't guessed where this was going, a NSFW reason. Four words: Tawny Kitaen nip slip. 

Now like a zillion times I had heard David Coverdale claim that in this video, there's a part where one of her breasts just pops on out, but I'd never believed it. He always uses it as a like "we were so wild in those days" anecdote. 

Having now gone through the video in my typical fine-toothed-comb manner (more or less frame by frame), I can say for myself: Um, it's there. Everyone I've shown it to has confirmed that yeah, we've got boobage. 

In the actual video, it goes by way too fast for you to notice. But slow it down and yeah, that just happened. And I'm not talking like, in an uncensored, never-shown-on-TV version. I mean like on MTV, on Vh-1, and most definitely on the official Whitesnake YouTube channel. This is not an urban legend, it's real. 

It really surprised me that it isn't already all over the internet. I mean, isn't this the kind of thing the internet lives for? Then again, I imagine it's probably not like, super hard to see just about anyone topless or whatever these days. 

Still, it kind of amazed me — for all the purported debauchery people always complained about in heavy metal videos, this was the first time ever that I was like, dang, they were a little bit right! (Er, well, actually, it's the left one.) 

Long story short, between the fast times, the sexy times, and all the keyboards, the "Here I Go Again" video more or less encapsulates the 80s. Or at least, one version of the 80s. A white dude, fast cars and fast women, keyboard-scored version.

Whitesnake, "Is This Love?"

I'm Feeling Very Tawny

THE VIDEO Whitesnake, "Is This Love?" Whitesnake, 1987, EMI

Click here to watch this video NOW!

SAMPLE LYRIC "Is this love that I'm feelin'? / Is this the looove, that I've been searchin' for-or? / Is this love, or am I dreami-iii-in'? / This must be love, 'cause it's really got a hold on mee-eeee / a hold on meeee"

THE VERDICT This isn't my favorite Whitesnake song, but it's Power Ballads Month, so I can't exactly blog about "Slow An' Easy" or "Give Me All Your Love." I do have a particular affinity for it though, as if nothing else, it always makes me think of my cat, Pudge. I have a habit of working my pets' names into songs and singing to them, and given that "Pudge" rhymes with "Love" she bears the brunt of this. Besides, lyrics like "Is this Pudge? That I'm feelin' / Is this the Pudge? That I've been searchin' for" crack me up. So even though this isn't my most favorite Whitesnake song (I've always taken issue with its inclusion on Monster Ballads), here we are, 'cause it's Power Ballads Month.

And this song has a pretty damn enjoyable video. I love it when heavy metal guys invite their real girlfriends to "act" in their videos -- yes, much like having your relationship or marriage showcased in a reality show, it's pretty much the death knell for your relationship, but it gets around the usual "they aren't paying me enough to do that" awkwardness, as the real-life girlfriends are willing to be a lot more demonstrative. Or something.

The video opens with the inimitable Tawny Kitaen in her exposed-brick apartment, hastily packing a few unmentionables while wearing a teensy white dress that may or may not have a super high-waisted 80s thong built into it. David Coverdale -- looking very Sonny Crockett in an unstructured suit with a low-cut tee under it -- basically just watches all this happen. Their initial interaction basically sets the tone for the entire video: Tawny acting all spastic and jumpy, and Coverdale acting tired and resigned. Is this love? I guess?



Everyone in Whitesnake -- and Tawny -- appear to be playing in some kind of vague, dry ice-filled area, with each musician or band member's girlfriend standing atop a kind of horizontal structure. Basically, imagine if Stonehenge fell over, someone dropped a bunch of dry ice there, and everyone in Whitesnake came and stood on it, swaying their hips while playing this song, and you've got it. It's actually a really similar set to the one used in Dio's "I Could Have Been a Dreamer" and W.A.S.P.'s "I Wanna Be Somebody," if you can believe it. On a semi-related note, the humidity seems to be doing a number on everyone's hair.

Tawny next does something that seems totally natural. She drops her trunk in the hallway and balances on top of it in a sexy pose. That's how I usual relieve my frustration. Per my comments before, Coverdale just stands in the hallway staring.

Next we get one of my favorite parts of this video. A flashback! Yes, to the good old days when she would give him a lap dance in their super-80s loft apartment. Look out though David, as when this cuts back and forth, it appears the dry ice is filling the hallway as well -- are they sure it isn't some kind of gas leak? After all, whenever we cut back to them playing the song, everyone seems pretty subdued. It's pretty dim so it's hard to see if Adrian Vandenberg is making his usual guitar face, but based on his other movements I'd have to say the answer is a shocking no.

Coverdale's just laying on the bed, so between that, the nearly catatonic band members, and this sludgefest of a song, it's up to Tawny to carry the whole thing. And she tries very, very hard, tossing around her gigantic mane of hair (seriously, it looks like it's 1/4 of her body weight!), making furious sexy faces at the camera, and getting jiggy with the stairwell railing. I really love how content she is to dance around the bed without getting anywhere near David Coverdale. Even when he reaches out to touch her, you get this sort of "you need to pay extra for that" feeling. Is this love? Umm, doesn't seem like it so far.

Unless, that is, you count the director's love for David Coverdale. They seem to have been so enamored of doing a quick-zoom on Coverdale standing in the hallways that they've felt the need to repeat it at least five times so far. If I were anyone else in the band, I'd be like, "so let's see, you've shown me in silhouette a few times and my face in shadow once, but we've now done a quick-zoom toward David five times?!?" And as I finish typing, they go in for a sixth quick-zoom.



We also keep getting these shots of everyone reflected in water, with a foggy background. In these, Tawny appears to be wearing David's blazer. Does the water signify that this isn't what's really happening? Possibly yes, as she's letting David kiss her. Did I neglect to mention that Tawny has changed into an equally tiny silky black dress? Well, she has. Nothing else has really changed though.

The guitar solo kicks things up a little bit. We actually get to see the rest of the band's faces, and they move around a bit more. At least reflected in the water, David and Tawny seem reasonably realistically affectionate toward each other. And as it wraps up -- look! -- after a few failed attempts, Coverdale finally gets Tawny onto the bed with him. Is this love? Ewww, the leering David out in the hall seems to think so.

Now Tawny's outside, and between the weird loft they live in and all the steam on the street outside, it appears they live near Vince Neil's place in "Don't Go Away Mad (Just Go Away)." She's put on a truly ridiculously proportioned white 80s coat, and in spite of all the sexy faces she was making at the camera a minute ago, she now appears determined to get out of there.

Frustrated, Tawny throws her trunk away, and as she's reaching her car (yes, it's one of the Jaguars from "Here I Go Again"), David Coverdale freakin' jumps out from the shadows, grabs her, and begins yelling at her and shaking her! Next thing you know, he has her laid out on the hood of the Jag and is kissing her neck. Is this love? Gosh, I sure hope not.

P.S. And I can't Kitaen myself! I swear, this is something Mike Myers as Wayne Campbell says at some point, but for the life of me I can't locate the source of this quote. Suffice to say the next words out of his mouth are likely "schwing!"

Whitesnake, "In the Still of the Night"

Somebody Call the Sex Police

THE VIDEO Whitesnake, "In the Still of the Night," Whitesnake, 1987, Geffen Records

Click here to watch this video NOW!

SAMPLE LYRIC "In the still of the night, I hear the wolf howl honey / sniffin' around your daw-awr / in the still of the night, I feel my heart beatin' heavy / tellin' me I gotta have moe-oh-awwwwwwwr"

EXCESSIVELY DETAILED DESCRIPTION In the still of the night, lead singer David Coverdale's then-wife Tawny Kitaen (who went on to divorce him and become co-host of America's Funniest People with another David, Coulier –- and yes sorry about this link, but it was one of the few I could find that at least had a picture), sits at a table and wipes herself down while a fan blows her awe-inspiring mane (even in a decade of big hair, this woman had big hair). Anyway. Meantime, hubbie Dave and the boys are tearing it up on a soundstage liberally decorated with the Whitesnake logo, which I swear to god Marc Jacobs would never admit to referencing but from which the designer borrows liberally –- two seasons ago he did a canvas bag that featured what was essentially the Whitesnake logo done with his own name.

Coverdale's mimicry of Robert Plant soon drives Kitaen from her apartment and into her amazing, very 80s stairwell (she appears to live in the same house that the Mary Jane Girls did in 'In My House'), where it disorients her, causing her to back into a wall and hike up her skirt before running down the stairs. Let the record show that in the still of the night she wears a bustier, a sort of layered, asymmetrical skirt, leather gloves, heels, and large sunglasses, which she tears off when she reaches the bottom of the stairs, facing the camera with that classic Tawny stare.

She enters her garage, which contains (whoa!) one of the Jaguars from the 'Here I Go Again' video. She shakes her ass at the car, perhaps giving it a taste of what's to come (again, viz 'Here I Go Again'), but then –- look! –- who's that standing in front of the other Jaguar from 'HIGA'? It's David Coverdale, of course. We don’t see a reaction from Kitaen, though we do see a random shot of her back at the table, misting her face with water. Coverdale finally pulls it together, saying "Over here, babe," since Tawny's still apparently intent on seducing the car, not the guy (this whole time she's sort of shaking her ass at the car and watching her shadow on the door at the same time). Parallel shots of Kitaen doing a Pat Benatar/Michael Jackson-style dance (it's about halfway between 'Love is a Battlefield' and 'Thriller') and Coverdale doing approximately the same thing to a microphone in front of a large, moon-like circle follow, leading Coverdale to finally pull his car around and Tawny to move toward it.

Smoke or steam of some sort pours across this moon as the entire band rocks out on a series of raised platforms while Coverdale utters a series of groans and shrieks in front of his moon. He eventually becomes a large silhouette in front of the picture of the band, sans moon. We flash back to Tawny at the table, smoking and putting on elbow-length gloves (the perfect thing to cool you off when you're as hot as she apparently is). Gloves on, she continues misting herself while we almost see the other band members: Though they seem ready for their close-ups, they're so backlit it's impossible to tell who's who.

As a violin (yes, a violin) kicks in, Tawny finally makes it out of the building, the camera stalking her from behind a fence of some sort as she struts down the sidewalk. She stops and stares at the camera, which pans up and down her body as smoke or steam or something clouds around her. At length, she appears to become self-conscious (!), and strides away briskly sort of holding herself with her arms. Meanwhile, we cut back to the band and yes, of course, the guitarist is sawing away with a violin bow (and an electric guitar). That's hot.

Tawny runs back up the stairs, and when we enter the apartment she's already comfortably face down on a love seat, blindfolded with her ass in the air. As the camera comes to meet her, Coverdale screams and Kitaen does too, looking really, really not hot. Everyone in Whitesnake goes wild at this turn of events, swinging guitars, pinwheeling with their arms, and finally showing the abandon they haven't really shown yet in this video (I mean come on, they haven't even let the Adrian Vandenberg make that ridiculous pouty face directly at the camera while dropping to his knees once!).

Why is she screaming? Well, she left the door open, and David Coverdale's totally stumbling around her entryway (possibly this was a scene torn from the real pages of their lives? I don’t know). Anyway, as the song appears to start over, Coverdale turns out to be sort of dancing (seductively?) while Kitaen vamps on the couch. As the song nears its frantic zenith ("Still of the night! Still of the night! Still of the night!"), we revisit some of our favorite shots from earlier in the video; Coverdale with the Jaguar, Kitaen with the spray bottle, etc., while everyone in the band flings their hair about for all it's worth. It is so intense that the chains holding some of the lights above Whitesnake's set break, but the band doesn't care.

Kitaen at long last gets her ass up and heads over to Coverdale for one of their trademark open-mouthed kisses (like a real snake, Coverdale seems to unhinge his jaw in an attempt to swallow her face). A happy ending? No! Someone has alerted the authorities, and Coverdale is being dragged away through the now Jaguar-less garage only to be thrown in the back of the van. Who are these buzzkillers? Apparently, they're the "sex police." Go figure.

THE VERDICT Seriously, if Led Zeppelin had still been together and making new music in 1987, this is exactly what it would have sounded like. Between the killer riff, the vocal squeaks and squawks, and all of the start/stop transitions, it sounds exactly like Led Zeppelin. (Until you hit the synthesizer violin part, then you realize, ah, it's 1987, and this is not Led Zeppelin.) You can definitely argue that it's easier to like bands (like Zep) that did not stay together and continue making music through the 80s because unlike with say, the Rolling Stones, you don't have to remember the sinking feeling you felt as you saw your counterculture idols donning cuffed blazers and skinny ties.

But anyway, that aside, this song kicks so much ass, even if it is sort of watered down 80s Led Zeppelin. I never get tired of it, just like people in the 80s apparently never got tired of Tawny Kitaen. Even if the video makes no damn sense (which really it doesn't —- but neither does any Whitesnake video), it continues to drive home some important points for Whitesnake fans. One, lead singer Coverdale at least at the time was totally hitting it with Tawny Kitaen. Two, he and Kitaen both drive (or at least lay on) expensive cars). And three, at least in this video, whatever they're up to is pretty damn kinky. After all, you don't see Jani Lane getting locked up by the sex police!

P.S.: Since I'm retitling this 2004 post from the magical future of 2010, this title is actually a very 2010 reference.